Deviant Login Shop
 Join deviantART for FREE Take the Tour
About Deviant Premium Member melissaFemale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 6 Years
3 Month Premium Membership:
Given by forshepard
Statistics 1,074 Deviations 38,942 Comments 307,183 Pageviews

Newest Deviations

Random Favourites

the stupendous forshepard renewed my subscription. ashley is a one-of-a-kind, beautiful person and her words reflect that.


i did indeed get my thigh tattoo! photo available upon request.


would anyone like to set a writing challenge and/or collab with me? i need stuff to get me back into the swing of things!


also, Reanimated4now painted a picture of me! i love how it came out:…


well that virgin never kept them from litteringbefore this ugly, flowered couch
bobbed down the river
and came to rest where water lapped semen
from its edge,
someone slept here unalone.
the stains in the cloth spell promises,
"my body goes here,
yours belongs there,"
the cigarette burns on the armrests
sketch stories of every
so-late-it's-early night.
the couch now sleeps with the water
and the lilies
and the riverbank,
the fish now suckle waterlogged cigarettes on
flowered, moonless nights.
and this sink, before they ripped the kitchen out,
held his dishes-
food-caked, abandoned dishes
broken in anger against
her shoulders and her forehead
and her screaming, ugly face.
this sink, submerged,
holds crawdads
and bluegill babies,
sand and rocks and
clean, clean shells.
and before the flood dragged it into the river,
this playhouse was well-loved by
the giggling, groping children.
"i'll be daddy and you be mommy,"
and the look he gave her said
"it's not because we're older than them."
then the playhouse was stolen by the storm and now
  .september -
i've been under
the illusion it's
a sunday
for four days,
i sit on your knee
at the kitchen table,
roll one of the
bullets under my finger
cold gold and
and smooth,
do you know what
that is? -
but i don't think
you do -

he says
you're fuckin weird,
you know that? fuckin
cold, maybe i'll just
start calling you
winter -

and he does
november -
they grace me with
three days, and i cannot
convince you
to come with me
december -
the only time i like you
is when you're asleep,
i gnaw one leg out of
a trap
just to crawl my way
into another
(it takes everything i have not to smash my bottle over your head)
  all this trouble for a cigarette.sometimes,
when i'm sad,
i think i love you.
but i don't.
you remember
all of the beautiful things
they've said about you.
but you forget
to say
all those beautiful things.
i think
you've forgotten to try
falling in love with me.
no worries.
i'll forget to try
loving you back.
  mossthe first time i kissed you
(you call me tight-lipped)
was the first time i felt real love
start to form like cool moss
soft patches tucked in my organs
coating my bones
and to love someone
(i've heard)
is to give them room to grow
and grow you have
like a forest
of silent, sturdy dedication
thick in the air like fog
the climate in between us
is cool and misty
settling and condensing
i will take care of your garden of moss
and kiss you loose-lipped
on lichen beds
if you hold me like a puddle
i think of you at night
and dream about osmosis
  make forevers in memories.we are not forevers
dancing on the borderlines
of infinty
 we are temporary
 our memories
are everlasting
  so do not hesitate
  to create them
  .i tell her
i do not want
i do not know
i say my mind
is confined
to me alone, and i
am confined
to the earth
(tomorrow said to yesterday, please meet me in the middle)
  never-ending car crash.i don't think that i love you,
but i know that i want
the privilege of being able
to say that i do, any time.
you said the word
as i watched the sun rise in my bedroom.
and swallowed it like the ocean
when i held my tongue.
i am so happy and so sad
to be with you now.
we light our wishes on fire
and send them to the stars together.
i can't sleep well
when you hold me like that,
but what good is sleep anyway?
never let me go.
  for the woman born an oceanthe world will
set your borders on fire
and congratulate you
when you shrink.
but you were born
an ocean; you are the
child of the moon and
not even she can
imprison your
do not let
them channel you
into their
   these bitter kids have sharper hipsoh, i am aching to pry apart this skull &
meet the ghosts thumping at its insides.
i'm just pining for a rib cage like a
funeral pyre or a staircase;
i want to bloom from these
bitter bones & waste -
(until i'm the corpse
sleeping in the casket)
  manic startswe first met
in sweat. the sun
carried our weight the way we carried
a tea bar, your father’s old guitar,
your ex-wife’s love bed (because her first
rest followed a third child, and  
the stains of two men). your eyes shone tired
and your face was matted to your hair,
rather than the other way around.
we first kissed
after a night of crying pursuing a year-long stupid
ex, after smoking my grief in a haze of ungiven
and your arms gently outstretched. you tasted
of bruised wanting and more sex.
we first fucked, where?
i’m sure it was after she was sleeping
upstairs or maybe the time you
put your lips to my rose, to the scent of
my flower mixed beside that tea bar
when we weren’t alone.
i like the way you smell. and the way
you looked so concerned when i took all those
pills and couldn’t even stay to be deserved—
you always were.
and i like how you always ask
if this is what i want, you ask and i say
that, and i love your skin’s cool kiss and
  .i have followed you, night
after night,
followed your voice, those silvery
ribbons of air -
led me to the black gates
where you lay,
curled -
i sit on my roof,
and the darkness sticks
out it's tongue
(it says make sure you smile, they'll think you're not glad to be here)
  tuesday nightsthe full moon aches.
tuesday nights are always full of statues.
i wonder what it is to be dead. do you remember
the mother? the comedown from the other, write
as an animal, as a breathing piece of fabric--
the fabric felt in the lines.
you are the main event. hold still.
disengage. you are no mercury flower.
imagine imagine imagine. the airplane
coating of skin to bone. all flesh is concentrated
on your ankles.
so much has happened and will happen
before we can respond to this as an end. epicenter.
the spider-work of lines.
the gas station attendant wondering
if he did the right thing.
the sky holding its breath, beware, beware.
there are no other answers.
there is never anything but light,
and light on light never told us anything about what
we needed to know or be or wear or be wary of.
catch the clouds in your hands.
call me miracle, though i am not
a thing of wonder, i am still
i am still a being made of sticks.
watch me fall apart.
exhaustion makes the most beautiful s
  and you are the loveliestit feels alright
to stop
being cruel to myself
& i am in question
but you seem eternal

Allie by EmilySoto anyone's ghost by curlytops Paper Memory by EmilySoto Paper Memory by EmilySoto 


ohsostarryeyed's Profile Picture
United States

writing/spoken word tumblr

photography website

vogue italia


model mayhem

my name is melissa and i have my reasons not to use capital letters.

i was born on the cusp of summer and fall in 1992, which feels like it was about twelve years ago - my maturity level reflects this. as a result, i am a poor college student. (if you would like to assist me in this endeavour, feel free to note me about receiving your own handwritten copy of my work and letter!)
i do not like certain words. (anion, anyways (because it's not really a word!), armpit, baked, blastula, breadth, bun, clotted, crusty, cusp, feasible, fondle, frottage, horndog, hospice, lest, mayochup, pusillanimous, refurbished, scalp, smug, sustenance, waft.)
i like quailman and dirty dick dastardly, and i hope you know who they are. i love with more than a love, and i quote things (in this case, edgar allan poe; in others, harry potter, 90s songs, and chuck palahniuk ) off the top of my head because it makes me feel good.

to do list: breathe, laugh, use tumblr less frequently.

inspiration| irving penn| emily tebbetts| katie lawrence| sarah smiley| moriah freed| larissa felsen| harley weir| daniyel lowden| chuck palahniuk| charles bukowski| jonathan safran foer| kurt vonnegut| franz kafka| geoff trenchard| buddy wakefield| everyone on my watch list

we were emergencies by buddy wakefield

We can stick anything into the fog and make it look like a ghost.

But tonight let us not become tragedies.

We are not funeral homes with propane tanks in our windows lookin’ like cemeteries. Cemeteries are just the Earth’s way of not letting go. Let go. Tonight, poets, let’s turn our wrists so far backwards the razor blades in our pencil tips can’t get a good angle on all that beauty inside.

Step into this.

With your airplane parts. Move forward.

And repeat after me with your heart: I no longer need you to fuck me as hard as I hated myself.

Make love to me like you know I am better than the worst thing I ever did. Go slow. I’m new to this, but I have seen nearly every city from a rooftop without jumping.

I have realized that the moon did not have to be full for us to love it. That we are not tragedies stranded here beneath it. That if our hearts really broke every time we fell from love I’d be able to offer you confetti by now.

But hearts don’t break, y’all, they bruise and get better. We were never tragedies. We were emergencies. You call 911. Tell them I’m havin’ a fantastic time.


Mon May 6, 2013, 9:40 PM
Mon May 6, 2013, 2:26 AM
Just saw your monroe annnd... I like it. Quite a lot. :)
Thu May 2, 2013, 6:41 PM
you are beautiful. just thought i'd tell you, because you might need someone to do so. <3
Thu Feb 28, 2013, 8:16 PM
hello you! :D it's been a long while...too long for my liking! i hope you have been well! p.s. i've followed you on tumblr. :huggle:
Wed Feb 20, 2013, 1:16 AM
Happy New Year, Miss Lovely, and may your heart feel better soon.
Fri Jan 4, 2013, 5:50 PM
I just want to tell you, I used to have a best friend with an eating disorder. Unfortunately I couldnt help her; as a result we drifted very far apart. If I could do anything it would be to make girls like her, an you, know how beautiful you really are.
Sun Oct 7, 2012, 5:55 AM
Mon Apr 16, 2012, 10:48 PM
You sent me a message 11 weeks ago. This is my first time checking dA in probably half a year.
Mon Apr 2, 2012, 11:43 PM
Congratulations, dear. c:
Wed Feb 22, 2012, 3:18 PM

what style of my writing do you like best? 

25 deviants said ALL OF THEM U BITCH
17 deviants said poetry
3 deviants said slam poetry
3 deviants said haiku
2 deviants said prose
2 deviants said NONE OF THEM U BITCH
No deviants said other (comment!)


Add a Comment:
forshepard Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2014   Writer
in case you were wondering: i bought you the premium. dA decided to be a fool and figured it wouldn't put my name up there, even though i selected the option to display my username. all of that aside, i thought i should let you know that i love you. you're always in my thoughts <3
ohsostarryeyed Featured By Owner 6 days ago
you are so fucking awesome to me, i think of you always as well <3 i love you, miss ashley! :heart:
forshepard Featured By Owner 5 days ago   Writer
you deserve it, melissa. you are one very lovely soul :heart:
i love you too :B
weaknesses Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2014  New member
hey sweetie
(this is ohsparrowsong's new account)
just sending you love.
ohsostarryeyed Featured By Owner 4 days ago
hello, dearest! :heart:
Rhiannon44 Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2014  New member
Thanks for the llama.
ohsostarryeyed Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2014
oaklungs Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2014
thank you ever so much for the watch :blushes: :heart:
ohsostarryeyed Featured By Owner Jun 25, 2014
of course :heart:
UnspecifiedUnknown Featured By Owner Jun 18, 2014   Writer
thank you kindly :heart: :heart:
Add a Comment: