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About Deviant Core Member melissaFemale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 7 Years
8 Month Core Membership:
Given by an Anonymous Deviant
Statistics 1,161 Deviations 39,158 Comments 326,714 Pageviews

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I'm going to go to NYC from the 4th-8th
57%
8 deviants said I'm broke and can't buy any art :(
14%
2 deviants said out of sheer force of will and manifesting this so that I have the funds to do so
14%
2 deviants said fuckin good for you, twat
7%
1 deviant said I've got the money but I don't want to buy any of your bullshit
7%
1 deviant said I'm in NYC! let's meet up!
0%
No deviants said ooh, let me give you a little money to help you out!
0%
No deviants said I'll take a print of any photo you've got
0%
No deviants said I'll take a handwritten copy of any poem you've written
0%
No deviants said do you even call yourself an artist? excuse me whilst I scoff
I want to smoke
the grey of the sky
til I'm not breathing in
the weight of everything
bearing down on my shoulders.

I've never been high
but it sounds like a place
far better than here,
somewhere in a cloud
instead of this ravine I've rolled
my car into
(my vehicle,
my body).

to drink and forget,
or drink and remember,
I want that until every exhalation
brings fire from my throat
and I am roaring
and burning down fields,
I am burning down cities,
and I am watching them
fall.

I only think about you
when it gets dark.

you feel like sharing needles,
you feel like hot water shaken across
winter ice.
it kind of feels like dying; but I know,
in truth:
it feels just like praying.
you always were a god to me
and god, doesn't it still just--
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incense II
(like the verb bc some lady definitely got mad at us)

model: sienna luna
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well, I thought I'd update. I honestly can't even remember if I've done it recently or awhile ago or what. idk I'm not doing as well as I'd like to be, and I keep minimising it because it's totally not as bad as it has been in past winters.

now I'm going to be super gross and ask something of you (you, who have stuck around through my writing lulls; who have tolerated my photography [which basically was called not good enough when I tried to work with an agency model, by her agent; idgi because I've been approached by numerous different agency models recently?]; who have seen my work decline in god knows how many ways):
my friend and I are hoping to go to NYC in early february. she's got her tickets all set, and while lodging will be set, which is amazing, but I definitely do not have the money for transport around the city or food. SO what I'm offering (even though the offer always stands):
* handwritten copies of my work. I tend to include a letter, etc. and I'm cool with negotiating price!
* prints of any of my photos!

I'm not looking to suck money out of you lovely humans, I'm just hoping to be able to go to new york to create some art for a long weekend.

-

moonrocksmeteor boy in black and blue
i roll over your craters on rainy winter nights
trenches, i imagine, line you laterally
like a fish
in an abyss
and i am there too
moonrock you are not
but unfathomable regardless
and while you are bruised like a spring peach
i admire you in the january freeze
  awakeningThe thing about my love,
growing thick to fill my neck-
is that it's dark and it's lonely
and when it eats, it starves the rest.
  blister.what would you taste like
when i kiss you goodbye
if not ash?
we play with flames
and each other's feelings.
if i cry like i did,
would you hold me again?
i like the way we love
between asleep and awake;
your arm draped over my hip,
your burning skin on mine.
we could love each other better
years down the line,
but we couldn't deny the sparks.
we've already caught fire.
i'm trying to learn
how to capture
smoke.
  Devious Journal EntryI keep listening to the same three songs on repeat.
---
lover's brother is building things in the workshop
just to tear them down with his hands. I lay awake 
at night & I think I can hear him, 
miles & miles away though I am. maybe it's
just my heart beating loud & erratic
in my ears. there's so much emptiness everywhere.
every noise echoes.
---
  comfort in companyI WANT TO BE THE PERSON          that is not afraid of being left. The person that has been left only a few times, by those that didn’t count for nothing, by those who did not leave spike-trails behind. I want to be the person who feels like silence relieves instead of like silence swallows. I want to be the person who is not bitter. I ask myself with every relationship: is my anger justified? Have I been hurt? Am I demanding? Is it just me, or does everybody I come close to catapult away. Is it just me, or am I cold, in winter, in summer, in love, in hate. Is it just me, or am I always leaving, always being left. Is it just me or was every word without meaning because we ended wordless.
AM I       a sensitive person, or are the ones I love softly purposely brutal? I watched a man die at my work. The beeping of the monitor growing louder as he sat up and curled his legs into his chest like he was going to

 

deviantID

ohsostarryeyed's Profile Picture
ohsostarryeyed
melissa
United States


writing/spoken word tumblr

flickr



my name is melissa.

i was born on the cusp of summer and fall in 1992, which feels like it was about twelve years ago - my maturity level reflects this. as a result, i am a poor college student. (if you would like to assist me in this endeavour, feel free to note me about receiving your own handwritten copy of my work and letter!)
i do not like certain words. (anion, anyways (because it's not really a word!), armpit, baked, blastula, breadth, bun, clotted, crusty, cusp, feasible, fondle, frottage, horndog, hospice, lest, mayochup, pusillanimous, refurbished, scalp, smug, sustenance, waft.)
i like quailman and dirty dick dastardly, and i hope you know who they are. i love with more than a love, and i quote things (in this case, edgar allan poe; in others, harry potter, 90s songs, and chuck palahniuk ) off the top of my head because it makes me feel good.

to do list: breathe, laugh, use tumblr less frequently.


inspiration| tim walker | irving penn | emily soto | mark harless | anna demarco | larissa felsen | harley weir | tamara lichtenstein | karen jerzyk | jimmy o'donnell | jeff bark | marta bevacqua | chuck palahniuk | charles bukowski | jonathan safran foer | kurt vonnegut | franz kafka | geoff trenchard | buddy wakefield | everyone on my watch list

we were emergencies by buddy wakefield

We can stick anything into the fog and make it look like a ghost.

But tonight let us not become tragedies.

We are not funeral homes with propane tanks in our windows lookin’ like cemeteries. Cemeteries are just the Earth’s way of not letting go. Let go. Tonight, poets, let’s turn our wrists so far backwards the razor blades in our pencil tips can’t get a good angle on all that beauty inside.

Step into this.

With your airplane parts. Move forward.

And repeat after me with your heart: I no longer need you to fuck me as hard as I hated myself.

Make love to me like you know I am better than the worst thing I ever did. Go slow. I’m new to this, but I have seen nearly every city from a rooftop without jumping.

I have realized that the moon did not have to be full for us to love it. That we are not tragedies stranded here beneath it. That if our hearts really broke every time we fell from love I’d be able to offer you confetti by now.

But hearts don’t break, y’all, they bruise and get better. We were never tragedies. We were emergencies. You call 911. Tell them I’m havin’ a fantastic time.

Shoutbox

BrittanniaRain:iconbrittanniarain:
Death by Chocolate!
Wed Jul 1, 2015, 9:19 PM
cholie:iconcholie:
:glomp:
Mon May 6, 2013, 9:40 PM
DEAD-OnTheInside
:)
Mon May 6, 2013, 2:26 AM
TheEmptyChest:icontheemptychest:
Just saw your monroe annnd... I like it. Quite a lot. :)
Thu May 2, 2013, 6:41 PM
BMWYSP:iconbmwysp:
you are beautiful. just thought i'd tell you, because you might need someone to do so. <3
Thu Feb 28, 2013, 8:16 PM
cholie:iconcholie:
hello you! :D it's been a long while...too long for my liking! i hope you have been well! p.s. i've followed you on tumblr. :huggle:
Wed Feb 20, 2013, 1:16 AM
pengirl100and2:iconpengirl100and2:
Happy New Year, Miss Lovely, and may your heart feel better soon.
Fri Jan 4, 2013, 5:50 PM
KaoticOutkast
I just want to tell you, I used to have a best friend with an eating disorder. Unfortunately I couldnt help her; as a result we drifted very far apart. If I could do anything it would be to make girls like her, an you, know how beautiful you really are.
Sun Oct 7, 2012, 5:55 AM
LetThereBeApples
:meow:
Mon Apr 16, 2012, 10:48 PM
hauntingmewithsmiles:iconhauntingmewithsmiles:
You sent me a message 11 weeks ago. This is my first time checking dA in probably half a year.
Mon Apr 2, 2012, 11:43 PM
Nobody

I'm going to go to NYC from the 4th-8th 

57%
8 deviants said I'm broke and can't buy any art :(
14%
2 deviants said out of sheer force of will and manifesting this so that I have the funds to do so
14%
2 deviants said fuckin good for you, twat
7%
1 deviant said I've got the money but I don't want to buy any of your bullshit
7%
1 deviant said I'm in NYC! let's meet up!
0%
No deviants said ooh, let me give you a little money to help you out!
0%
No deviants said I'll take a print of any photo you've got
0%
No deviants said I'll take a handwritten copy of any poem you've written
0%
No deviants said do you even call yourself an artist? excuse me whilst I scoff

Comments


Add a Comment:
 
:iconberkleydown:
BerkleyDown Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2016  Student General Artist
Your writing..,
Reply
:iconsnakekiller9119:
snakekiller9119 Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2015  Student General Artist
Good Poems. Very good. Check out mine if you don't mind :3 not as good as yours
Reply
:iconretro-grade1:
Retro-Grade1 Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2015  Professional Traditional Artist
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MELISSA!!!!! :cake: :heart: :cake:
I hope your day has been a splendid one, and may your evening be even better!!! :tighthug:

Ian
Reply
:iconithaswhatitisnt:
ithaswhatitisnt Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
Happy birthday!! :tighthug: :heart: I hope you have a wonderful day!! :iconrainbowcakeplz:
Reply
:iconsesam-is-open:
sesam-is-open Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2015
Happy Birthday - PNG by lifeblue :party:
Reply
:iconretro-grade1:
Retro-Grade1 Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2015  Professional Traditional Artist
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MELISSA!!!! :cake: :heart: :cake:
May you have an absolutely wonderful, perfect day!!
:tighthug:
Ian
Reply
:iconsalt-and-the-moon:
salt-and-the-moon Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Hey love, I'm back... but you seem to be gone :(
Reply
:iconohsostarryeyed:
ohsostarryeyed Featured By Owner Jun 11, 2015
I've never been truly gone, always lurking a bit! but idk I'm kinda wavering on coming back, about to make a journal about it I think! <3
Reply
:icontacitaquipper:
tacitaquipper Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
The stark tones of your imagery is very powerful. To quote Nietzsche, "you must have chaos in your soul to give birth to a dancing star." You have many dancing stars, and we adore them, but it appears to be at the price of your sanity.

Quite a high stake trade off, don't you think?
Reply
:iconhell-on-a-stick:
hell-on-a-stick Featured By Owner Feb 9, 2015  Professional Writer
:wave:
Reply
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